How to show compassion to coworkers having a rough holiday season

How to show compassion to coworkers having a rough holiday seasonHow to show compassion to coworkers having a rough holiday seasonFor some, the holidays are leid the most wonderful time of the year. While the winter months can bring merriment, promotions, and holiday bonuses, they can also bring layoffs and unexpected personal losses. Sometimes, we think the compassionate move is to not acknowledge our coworkers loss. We see acknowledgment of someones pain as inflicting another painful reminder.But grief experts say thats the biggest mistake we can make. Instead of tiptoeing around the subject, heres how to acknowledge someones loss and show compassion to your coworkers who are struggling this season.Dont pressure employees to be happyRecognize that no amount of positive thinking is going to make your coworker feel better at this time. If your colleague just lost their job, telling them Everything happens for a reason or time heals all wounds is not helpful, its cruel. It puts undue pressure on a struggling employee to meet your standard of how they should act.As Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant, two experts who have researched how people have recovered from hardship, put it Pressuring people to be happy is a surefire way to make them sad feeling bad about feeling bad just makes us feel worse.Instead of telling your co-worker to cheer up through well-intentioned, unhelpful help, acknowledge their feelings. Say youre sorry they are going through this. Admit that you dont know the right thing to say.Dont compare woundsWhen an employee confides in you about their problems during the holidays, dont talk about yours in response. Everyones loss is unique, and comparing your war story to your coworkers is not empathy because it does not acknowledge their unique pain.As grief therapistDr. Patrick OMalley told Ladders,This is their story, not yours.Dont say Let me know if theres anything I can doAcknowledging someones struggle means going beyond the initial words of ackno wledgement. Instead of making a blanket statement offering to help, do something specific. Well-intentioned platitudes like Let me know if theres anything I can do put the burden on the employee going through hardship to ask for help. When the burden is placed on the employee, they may not reach out at all and will most likely continue to suffer alone.To avoid these mistakes, grief experts suggest taking concrete, specific actions. These actions do not have to be grand gestures to be meaningful. If your colleague just lost their job, your offer to edit their resume and cover letters will be more meaningful than Im sorry. If your co-worker is in the hospital, making a home-cooked meal or bringing their favorite magazine is going to leave a deeper impression.Above all, the best sttze you can give an employee going through a rough time is letting them know through words and actions that they are not going to be going through this hardship alone.